Processing Hard News Without Losing Ourselves

When life feels unsettled, I begin here. A pause, a breath, and the choice to think gently.

This past week asked a lot of me. I learned that there had been some progression, and with that came the loss of hearing the word stable, a word that has offered me comfort for a long time. The news landed in my body before my mind even had a chance to catch up. For a moment, I felt that old familiar pull toward negativity. Our human brains are wired for it. They rush to protect us by imagining the worst, even when we are doing our best to stay steady.

But somewhere inside, I reminded myself that I still get to choose my thoughts. Even when life feels unsettled in one corner, I can look around and notice where calm still lives. That reminder became my anchor. It also became a quiet invitation to walk myself through a gentle three-step process. One that allowed me to feel what was real without letting fear take the wheel, and one that nudged me to keep focusing on steps forward to bring me back to stable again.

1. Pause and name what is hard

I stopped long enough to say the truth out loud. This is difficult. This information hurts. This uncertainty shakes me. Naming it softened the edges. It took the power out of the spiral and placed it back where it belonged, in my hands. When we acknowledge what is heavy, our nervous system exhales, enabling us to calm and see the next steps forward.

2. Choose a thought that supports steadiness

Once I slowed the spiral, I reached for one clear thought. Not perfection. Not forced positivity. Just a steadying truth. I do not know everything yet, but I do know I am supported. I can root myself in what is true today, feeling healthy. With that shift, my mind became a calmer place to stand. I reminded myself that my thoughts shape my experience. And this week, I chose thoughts that helped me stay grounded and kept me focused on moving toward stability again, one gentle step at a time.

3. Focus on one area I can influence

When life feels out of control in one direction, I turn toward what still listens to my influence. Small things. Daily choices. Routines that bring peace. The way I nourish my body. The conversations I have. The boundaries I set. Even preparing for the months ahead in Costa Rica reminded me that life holds beauty alongside uncertainty.

These three steps did not erase the difficulty of the week, but they carried me through it with steadiness, clarity, and a little more softness toward myself. Life will always hand us moments that shake our footing. What matters is how we return to ourselves. How we breathe. How do we choose our thoughts? How do we keep finding small places of peace when the big things feel uncertain?

I will keep choosing that path. And if you are facing something heavy, I hope you find a thought today that supports your steadiness, too.